Wednesday, January 23, 2013

White's only...

Bench for Carlotta Walls LaNier  of the Little Rock Nine
I am grounded in Elkhart, Indiana at my boyfriend's parents home.  To sit and type an email is such a luxury.  I am sitting in a recliner, with a warm cup of coffee, next to a fire with luxurious internet and electricity at my fingertips.  Everything is amazingly convenient here.  I like that I forgot this lifestyle and have grown to appreciate an existence "without".  

The day prior to Martin Luther King Jr. day, Miles and I walked the grounds of Central Little Rock High School in Arkansas. It was here desegregation of the all white school took place, where nine African American students were escorted by Federal troops into the school building on September 23, 1957. While there, I envisioned the fear and uncertainty that each of these individuals must have faced in their decision to take a step closer to human equality.

Speaking of equality, we watched the movie "Lincoln" last night.  It stirred  emotions inside me from great frustration and sadness to a peace of mind that there are individuals with reasoning and awareness such as President Lincoln's, in times of great confusion and strife.  I suppose that's what I hope for my life;  to be faced with adversity/ignorance and hold to wisdom and love for humanity.  I'm toying with how to apply my mental health degree in some form that is both creative and innovative.  The way I experienced the "system" as it is, is not as effective as it can be, which is fine, but just not for me.  

This adventure of mine is close to the end of its fifth month.  I look back three months ago and the experiences and memories seem like forever.  I have experienced such an incredible amount of life that it seems, compared to most, that time has stood still or even stopped.  I had a theory years ago about the secret to the fountain of youth, or at least how to slow down time.  Time for children moves slowly due to the constant processing of new stimuli and creating their schema for life.  I have basically reverted back to having "child eyes".  Instead of accepting someone's opinion of something, their judgment based off of their experience, I get to be objective and see firsthand for myself.  I realize how often we accept our reality from textbooks, other people's experiences, the web, etc. without experiencing it firsthand.  

And most importantly, I thought of my experience of visiting the Lincoln Memorial, standing in the same spot Martin Luther King, Jr. stood and gave his eloquent and iconic speech and seeing countless names of soldiers who had died in the Vietnam War.  No one can take these moments from me; the silent, sorrowful moments where I have felt utterly lost by the immensity of human pain and suffering that has gone before me. To even feel that pain for a moment is more than I wish for anyone, past, present or future. Although I am only one person, I vow to use my time on this earth to do as the great Martin Luther King did before me, and add as much peace, love, and understanding to a world desperately needing it.