Friday, January 10, 2014

Fasting and the Beast...

First, a shout out to my sister-in-law Melinda. Thank you for your support and inspiring me to keep going. This post is a piggyback on yesterday's topic of commitment. I want to provide some background and answer the question "why the hell should I listen to her, anyway?" Well, here's why.
Notice the jug of water?
It was into the third week of my solo cross country road trip when I landed at Cave Run Lake Campground in Kentucky. Three days earlier I made a goal to fast for ten days, journaling the process, in order to gain awareness into my inner self. Here's that days journal entry: "I ended up in Ashland, Minnesota, watching lightning on the top of a look out view over Lake Superior. When I awoke, I got an oil change and had decided the evening before to start fasting. A most inspirational and emotionally moving phone conversation with a friend solidified my desire to take another conscious step. After receiving all the food from Brita, the woman in Cokato, Minneosta, I felt overwhelmed and although extremely grateful, it was not upholding my need for increasing consciousness. Having fasted for four days before, I know the benefits fasting holds. No food equals the stomach throwing a tantrum and the mind responding. Without investigating the relationship we trust the two are speaking honestly and with integrity. False. The times my stomach is most "angry" is when I'm the most distracted or caught up thinking "in my head." As I come to the moment, bring awareness to the environment around me, I know I'm ok. I know my body is capable, not only capable but desires to be taken care of. Each time I think thoughts about food, how great it is, and how one McDonald's french fry won't hurt, I realize it's just the mind playing tricks on me and I vividly am aware how easy it is to forgo values and goals and promises to the self. Without strengthening the control we have over our mind, we are susceptible to its demands. I know I will survive without food but my mind is screaming the opposite. I hope I win."

I did win. I made it to the ten day mark, feeling empowered and aware of my thoughts. I found control over the "beast" within. Here's some facts about "the beast." He is selfish and always, always wants more. He cannot differentiate between wants and needs which means he NEEDS everything. He needs ice cream, the latest iPad, a cheeseburger, a newer car, a bigger house, more gadgets, friends and of course, money. He doesn't care about health or happiness because he doesn't feel emotions. You, believing what he says is the truth, give into his every desire, hoping doing so will bring you peace, but it doesn't.

Crap, I'm going to be late for work! Pardon me for now. See you tomorrow. Happy Friday!